A day in the life of the holidaying NITWian

5:20 fight for your right to sleep five more minutes. Plead, push, pummel finally give up the matador bull named mom. [oops I meant matador cow :D]

6:20 get caught red handed for sleeping over the morning paper. Get sent to the kitchen by Hitler to help the matador cow out. Help, learn your basic lessons in kitchen simply because “you have grown as big as a guy-buffalo”. [Courtesy: Amminniamma, my sweet maid servant. You have to translate the phrase into malli to appreciate it]

7:20 help your sister with her homework. Fully utilize the chance. Give her a long lecture on why it is important to be regular, else you end up like the author.

8:20 wave your parents goodbye as they leave for work. Do a jig. Celebrate your hard earned freedom by hitting the couch.

9:20 relish your moments of blissful sleep

10:20 wake up with a jolt as the phone rings. Answer the matador cow’s “you weren’t sleeping right?” with an emphatic no.

10:25 try every other number you know. Only to hear

1) “the Vodafone customer you are trying to reach is switched off”

2) “hey da, sorry me in class. Might get caught any moment. Ttyl ok”

3) “ya will catch up with sometime. Did you say you are leaving on 20^th. Damn it man!! I got university exams till 21^st.”

4) “Internal exams da. I am already on the verge of flunking. Hey btw me free on any day after 22^nd. We will have a blast then. What you leaving on 20^th. No Xmas hols?? How dumb.”

11:00 curse the dude from surathkal.

11:05 switch on the tv. Realize that you have no idea who is having an extra marital affair with whom in the saas bahu serials; That the mallu family tear jerkers are exactly at the same place where you left them 3 months ago; That you have seen every other movie, thanks to the LAN; that you are above the Indian television and settle for India- Pakistan test series.

12:00 curse the dude from surathkal

12:20 walk into the kitchen. Get the strong feeling that okra fry and fish moily is too boring. Go online. Download “The Mexican cook book”. Scan the recipe. Find alternatives for every other ingredient coz u can’t find them in the kitchen.

13:00 hear the door bell ring. Answer Rasheeda aunty’s “is everything ok mole? I could smell something burn” with a sheepish grin.

13:20 thank your stars that the fire engine didn’t turn up. fish moily and okra fry does taste heaven.

13:25 sit down with the Hindu Crossword, Roget’s thesaurus and the oxford dictionary. Stare for one hour. Get two clues right, lucky if you are

14:20 go down on your knees. Pray to a certain wizard of words famous for his glutTony.

14:25 realize crossies aren’t for engineers with pea sized brains.

14:30 shift your focus to the last page of the paper. Try the sudoko. Waste an hour. Get enlightened to the fact that it is too hard. Curse your pea sized brain. Oops no curse the dude from surathkal

14:45 go online. Find similar holidaying NITWians (HN)

Excerpts from a conversation

“Me: hey

HN1: howdy?

Me: bored ra to death

HN1: same here. Every friend of mine has exams now

Me: same pinch

HN1 : ouch that hurt

Me: :)”

“HN2: hey

Me : hows u?

HN2: bored to death man

Me : same here. Every single friend of mine has exams now

HN2: same fate here

Me: kill the guy from surathkal”

15:20 invite every other holidaying nitwian you know to a group chat. Swear at gtalk for not doing the job well. Shift to YM. Listen to your friend say he doesn’t have YM installed Shift back to gtalk. Play the fool around. Conspire to murder the dude from surathkal.

16:20 do some orkutting. Classify people on your friends list into buggers, big buggers, and bigger buggers. Write dumb testimonials for dumb friends ;). Go be a fan of some arbit guy.

17:20 welcome the matador cow back home

The author wishes to terminate the article right now. She is simply too bored to continue any more. Happy holidaying!!! And ya to hell with the dude from surathkal