1 This is not a movie review – it is just an honest opinion about *surprise surprise* yet another sucky Hindi movie.
2 I didn’t know Farah Khan was a female till yesterday.
3 I never wanted to do this but dumb idiots like Priya (or more aptly a numbskull) pushed me into it!
4 Criticism is welcome but it’ll just be directed to my trash bin.
5 To quote a Reebok Tee “ I don’t have an attitude problem - I have the attitude, you have the problem”
6 I won’t give you a spoiler alert because frankly I can’t make it any worse for you.
I woke up. I was brushing my teeth. Jebby said “you coming for OSO?” I blinked. “Om Shanti Om, we’re all going”. I nod. 3 hours later everyone agrees the movie is pathetic.
With all the hype that surrounded OSO (which you’ve to say is the dumbest acronym ever for a movie title!) I guess I should be forgiven for expecting something remotely watch-able.
Ok I’m not going to prejudice your decision in anyway except tell you what the movie is about. Please read this with an open mind and make your own informed opinion about this sad, pathetic, mind numbingly stupid movie!
Here’s the deal - some dumbass in the 70s is a wannabe star or junior artist to be more precise, and his name? Yes you guessed it smartass! OM. Ok now for the heroine – a mega star in the 70s who our hero is in love with - yeah you’re right again Shanti! And their kid who completes the movie – Om you think? Well no way Jose! We ain’t gonna make this movie so damn logical!
Instead OSO makes spoofs of some more dumbass hindi movies – spoofs which could have been done much better by Parth et al. Sample this for the spoofy names the O! SO brilliant makers came up with - "Dhoom5" *scratches head*, "Phir bhi dil hai NRI" *contemplates standing on the head and yelling wooga wooga*, "Return of the khiladi" *wants to scream but can’t find the voice*, and "Main bhi hoon naa" (I swear my lap top crashed at this point due to over-exposure of unfunniness). Now compare this to Pedro’s “Eternal moonshine of a spotless behind” and judge how pathetically amateurish OSO is.
Oh and what happens in the rest of the movie you ask? Some more dumbasses get together and sing “all hot girls put your hands up and say OSO! All cool boys come on make some noise and say OSO!” Could it be any lamer? And the best dialogue in the movie is an internet rip-off! (for people who think I’m making this up please read the last line of this blog )
Om and Shanti die or rather are killed by the villain. Om reincarnates as a great star and suddenly an apple falls on his head and he remembers everything about his past. He finds a Shanti look-alike and nearly scares the crap out of our villain. But he is smart enough to know the look alike is not a ghost so he says BOO and is about to get away. But then the real ghost of Shanti appears and kills him!
What a great way to get revenge! Wait for 30 years till shah rukh khan grows up again, and a look alike sprouts up from nowhere. And then kill the villain who ( now in his sixties) in the mean time went to Hollywood became a limousine riding, high flying American badass and lived his life to the fullest! Too damn brilliant! Here’s an advice to the cops - don’t bother searching for murderers they’ll eventually die of old age!.
Oh and in between somewhere Shah Rukh has a word for his fans’ criticism for this post “shove it up your nose, shove it up your nose!”
